Big Daughter is Watching You

My father is back in his apartment and making progress, there’s a few humbling changes to his routine. No more late night showers when no one can hear him scream. He brags about how he’s gone high tech with a computer glued to his wrist. Dad will comply with just about every suggestion as long as pizza is supplied. He’s enjoying the attention of pretty girls who are helping him regain his independence. He became disillusioned when I explained that Medicare doesn’t cover aides to scrub his back or put lotion on his feet. “You told me that insurance pays for everything,” he lamented. Well, almost.

This morning we drove through a rainstorm (rare in this beach town) for various appointments. Due to lack of sunshine, I decided to hang out in the facility’s courtyard to catch up on local gossip. To my surprise, ladies came over to say "oh good you're here, if you're not I get worried." It was like having a dozen Jewish mothers in absentia. Meanwhile 99-year old Ida volleys with "you? You're still here? Don't you have a home?"

Tonight’s meal in the main dining room was delayed due to the Board of Trustees meeting in the lobby next door. Food delivery was ignored while the Board members feasted on wine, stuffed mushrooms and chopped liver. Things got ugly. Seniors started yelling and clanking their empty plates just like prison inmates. I joined the Board meeting, chatted with the CEO, and brought back appetizers to Dad’s table, plus 2 glasses of wine for me. This violated many rules, including kosher safeguards, and gained me a round of applause from everyone. The bartender gave me a nice bottle of Chardonnay to sneak into Dad’s walker basket.

I'm not a saint, I have periods of resentment. However being here is time well spent and an amazing learning experience. Interactions with my father eerily parallel my patient advocacy schoolwork and provide lots of material; it's easy to get As on essays.

The best incident of the day: Dad happily commenting to his buddies “I have so much to write about in the next chapter of my autobiography!” I had the same idea.