There’s Dick – he entered the community with his wife, then she quickly deteriorated to advanced nursing care, they now live apart in separate buildings. He visits her daily to have lunch, she doesn’t always recognize him. He has accepted his situation with grace.
There’s Tom, an 80-year retired chiropractor who had the same cataract operation as my father with a different outcome. He is now legally blind. His kids insisted that he leave his practice and his home for a better support system. Tom didn’t really resist, since he had admitted his own mother into the same place 20 years ago. She progressed through all the levels of care and died a while back, so they didn’t save her apartment. Note that he’s not the only second generation resident.
There’s Harry – married to his war bride imported from England 68 years ago. They are 92 years young and still in love. He lost his hearing a long time ago, and occasionally wears hearing aids. When he doesn’t, things get pretty loud in their apartment. Their next door neighbor raps on the wall, which embarrasses his wife. She told me “this guy complains all the time about the noise, it’s not just when we’re having sex!”
The women rule the roost. They filter the junk mail, power walk around the courtyard and gossip. They greet me by name and make sure I’m eating right. Sometimes I imagine my mother socializing with these ladies, and wonder how she would have fit in. She’s been gone 4 months now and I’m beginning to miss her. It’s probably for the best that Dad is solo – he is truly enjoying himself. He finally got his new eyeglasses and can see clearly for the first time in ages. He’s curious about what all the folks look like since they’ve been blurry since he moved in. He has a pile of books to catch up on, and he’s writing another chapter of his life story.
Most residents don’t celebrate Christmas, as the community is 99% Jewish. However, they are having lots of holiday parties, along with happy hour every Thursday. On New Year’s Eve, there’s a shuttle trip to the local Krispy Kreme factory to watch donuts being made. I’m missing that event but I’ll be back in January. It’s kind of my second home.
Happy holidays to everyone, treasure your family and friends, and your health.
